Happy birthday!

David Strathairn looks cautious

"They call me Bendy McBendFace"

It took an idiot like Dr. Oz to finally sunset that needlessly obtuse word, but we finally did it.

fondle it. if it is a lot like your favorite... then it is ready.

I grow them as well, black and slightly red. Let them ripen in your kitchen.

HAM...

https://mltshp.com/p/1NTI2

The razor subtracts 10 years!

@MackReed #facts

The shower probably didn't hurt either. Today marks 6 weeks in Denver for me.

if you’re brave enough

At least bring her some flowers!

Philly Boy Roy agrees #bestshow4life

Sure, why not?

Are hastily dissembled street poker "bouts" a thing in the States? Is some sort of public card game prohibition in place? I have wandered the southern hemisphere for over 45 years and never found a single discarded playing card on the street.

@hertz I walk a lot. I see a lot of thrown out and lost stuff.

I find a card about once a month, but lately there has been a lot.

This particular card was in an intersection with another card visible in the street about ten yards away. I think maybe someone was throwing cards out of a car, or someone was having some sort of episode while walking, or, since it was close to my house, someone is playing me.

Are you working to collect a full 52 in various deck styles? That would be entertaining to try playing with.

@MackReed I remember seeing online someone who had claimed to have found a complete deck.

I've been finding cards since the Summer of 1985, and I'd be surprised if I found a whole deck. I've found the same card twice in a row, but I doubt I've found a whole deck.

Dank

more like the whole-grain mustard frog, amirite?

@niicholas Hehehehehe

is a friend

The worst coworker.

FFS Sara just do your job and shut up

So, like, are they actual accountants? Hardy har har!

"He got the bigger half!!! MOMMMM!!!"

And this is why we left the office

God, the entitlement, and honestly, why would you be part of the narrative around scrutiny, like what's the advantage here? There's none.

TEACHER YOU FORGOT TO GIVE US OUR HOMEWORK

The littlest Eichmann

New CDC guidelines for E. coli prevention.

That Adolph Hitler one is amazing.

godDAMNit

Excellently executed, but still somehow deserves featuring on the tumblr https://justtwothings.tumblr.com/

You can't spell either of those with "Ubb!"

@ba Oswald the Lucky Rabbit nods happily

@ba you can't "ubb" without u, bb!

'tugging', surely

So, he’s an alien? Makes sense.

Wanda Wanda Wanda

V cool

I hope you made an impression when you passed that long line of cars dropping off their kids because traffic near schools is so dangerous. Maybe you even inspired a parent to also get a long tail.

As a guy who bikes his kid to school, welcome to the club!

@mare it’s amazing. Especially the first day. I got my kids, posed for a picture, and left before the person at the back of the line when I arrived got half way through the queue.

@BennyTheIcepick I did this last year, too (which was our first public school year). It’s fantastic. My eight year old has told me it’s the best part of the day and she actually likes school so brb gotta cry a bit.

@robotmachine <teacher hugs> I’m excited to get back in the classroom and I have three weeks to go!

@m3moellering <3 <3

Yay for cargo bikes! I am proud to say that when I ride my kiddo to school on our longtail there are often one or two other moms or dads there doing the same thing. Still plenty of cars around but great to see other families pedaling!

There are many many worse That Guys to be. Well done!

@samh @robotmachine
My kid had taken to saying “why drive when you can bike?!” and it warms my dead black heart.

@LiberNoxSecreta Now that's a coincidence. Lara is one of my wife's oldest friends.

@heyitsal wow, that's really cool. Thanks for the comment and info.